Wisdom Wednesday: 9 Basics When Dealing with Stress and Anxiety in our Kids

This month’s Wisdom Wednesday is all about something that is becoming more and more common as our world gets more and more hectic: stress and anxiety in kids. A lot of parents don’t know how to deal with this issue, so I’m going to give you some tips on how to help your child manage their stress levels and live a happier life.

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Anxiety and stress are a natural part of life.

If your child is irritable and angry, having trouble sleeping, and having physical symptoms like fatigue, headaches, or stomach aches. These are symptoms of anxiety and stress.

Some children keep their worries to themselves and will not let you know what they feel. They may also not have the words to tell what is happening.

As a parent, we need to help guide them through these times and not shield them from them.

20% of school-aged children are experiencing anxiety symptoms.

How can I help my child with stress and anxiety?

The basis of stress and anxiety

1. Encourage your child to face their fears and not run away from them. We all want to avoid situations that we are afraid of. Let your child know that anxiety does reduce over time.

2. Tell your child that it is okay to make mistakes. It is normal to make mistakes. I’ts how we learn.

3. Focus on the positives.

4. Schedule relaxing activities. Everyone needs time to relax. Sometimes fun activities like sports can become more about competitiveness than about fun. Make sure your child has time every day to play a game, with toys or just be silly.

5. Reward your child with a hug, praise, a sticker or a treat. If you reward great behaviours, then children will engage in them more often.

6. Encourage a good sleep routine. Set a regular bedtime and stick to it. It might be turning off all electronic equipment 30 mins before bed. That way, the brain has time to relax from a heightened state.

7. Model self-care and positive thinking. Your child will do what you do, so if you avoid facing your fears, so will your child. If you face your fears, so will your child. If you take care of yourself and schedule time for your own needs, your child will learn that self-care is an important part of life.

8. Encourage your child to express his/her anxiety, worries or thoughts. Be present when they are talking to you. This will send the message to your child that they are important, you are a safe place for them and that they can tell you anything. Validate what they are saying by asking open–ended questions. Don’t solve their problem for them. Help your child to identify possible solutions. If they cannot find a solution, talk through some potential solutions and ask your child to pick the solution that they think would work best. This helps them to solve their own problems and helps build resilience.

9. Practice relaxation exercises with your child. Sometimes really basic relaxation exercises are necessary to help your child to reduce their stress and anxiety. This might mean telling your child to take a few slow, deep breaths (and you take a few slow breaths with your child so your child can match your pace). Or they might imagine they are somewhere relaxing, like the beach or in their favourite peaceful place. Ask your child to close their eyes and imagine the sounds, smells, and sensations associated with the image. For example, close your eyes and picture themselves there. Listen to the sound of the sea as the waves come in and go out. In and out. Now, focus on the feel of the warm sand beneath your fingers and the sun warming your skin. Remember to stay calm, if need be take a deep breath and relax.